Wednesday, September 2, 2015

How pain builds and destroys champions

       Hola my friends! Just got back from beautiful Costa Rica with the family on a much needed vacation. I desperately needed a break and a moment to breath and clear my head. Now that I'm back it's time to get ready for October 9th at the Bradenton Convention Center where I will be putting my Muay Thai skills to the test against Aaron Conway. Hit me up for tickets if you need them I'm stoked to fight someone with a similar mindset like mine, I'll write about that at another time but for now let's get into this. 
       Pain breeds champions and it also destroys them. When I mention the word pain it naturally gives the connotation of a physical trauma of some sort but I'm talking about mental and emotional pain. The pain of sharing clothes between 2 or 3 siblings, of violence in the neighborhood, losing a friend or family member, domestic violence, the kind of pain that starts a fire that can only be extinguished by accomplishment and success beyond the comprehension.
I mean Mike Tyson made 300 million dollars between the 80's and 90's. That type of money was unfathomable for anyone coming from his type of background. A street kid from Brooklyn committing petty crimes with no real chance of a future until he started boxing. Emotional suffering is as much of a motivator as it is a shackle. It is this feeling and the ability for those affected by it to inflict their pain on others whether consciously or subconsciously.

    Most underprivileged youth and even adults don't have the resources to get mental health care to deal with the pain. Counseling is so far out of the realm in some places that it is even frowned upon. The question becomes then, would we have the greats like Bernard Hopkins, or even Johnny Tapia if it wasn't for the struggle of an unfortunate background ie. the pain. What about the Muay Thai greats and there are many and as much as the sport has grown worldwide Thailand is still a very poor country. Children are fighting in Thailand at an early age to earn money to feed their families as chronicled in movies like Buffalo Girls. Sylvie von Ittu recently wrote that her friend Phet Jee Jaa, who my
daughter Nin was named after, was until recently sharing a mouthpiece with her little brother. Phet Jee Jaa is such a good fighter that she was at one point banned from fighting boys. In my experience the Thai people are always smiling and happy but there must be something to the fact that some of the best all around strikers in the world come from one of the poorest places.
    When we discuss why inner city kids don't really get into games like golf in this country it always comes back to economy. Golf is expensive, you have to buy the equipment, the balls, not to mention you can't even get on a course if not dressed properly. Fighting is cheap, you have all the equipment you need attached to your body. Obviously gloves etc. would come in handy but as I remember it growing up in Chicago some of the best fights I ever saw were out in the streets. I can't even remember how many times I or another friend uttered the words, "let's play karate". It didn't cost anything for us to wrestle or kick the crap out each other for an hour.
    Sorry, started to ramble..lol. The truth is that pain, emotional distress, anger about growing up in an unfortunate situation can push a person to the limit. Take a fighter like Ronda Rousey, the other female fighters in her division are all good athletes but having lost her father/best friend to suicide at a young age has pushed her to be better then everyone else. She was a bronze medalist in the Olympics at Judo and started off her MMA career by finishing all of her opponents by throws and armbars but just recently she face planted Bethe Correia with a right hand. Bethe made the mistake of mentioning suicide when trying to build the fight. That punch that put her down was partially solid technique and part punishment for having the gall to involve herself in the pain that built Ronda.
If you are ever faced with having to fight a person that comes from a painful situation there are several ways to go about the mental battle with that person. You can bring up there personal life and issues to try to get them to be emotional and out of their game or you can simply let them know that your skills are better. It's often been proven that the latter way is the better and more honorable way in other words, don't poke the bear.
          Fighters can start to feel unstoppable and sometimes they are. The downfall of course comes later, but not always. It definitely depends on the person, but it also depends on their circle of friends and whether or not they have dealt with the pain. I feel like that need to release the built up anger and emotional destitution sometimes just doesn't get quenched. You can be on top of the world with everything you ever wanted and the ability to take care of your family but behind your smile and beneath the scars of battle the pain is still their. Drugs and alcohol often become the crutch for fighters when they can't release that pain anymore. Look at a champion like Oscar de la Hoya, he ended up with a cocaine problem and some unsightly photos floating around on the internet. Maybe it's the you that nobody else sees. The part of you that you can verbally share and even shed a tear about with friends but they can never actually understand unless they had a similar upbringing. So when people say things like "I can't believe he blew all his money" or "why does he keep getting in trouble it makes no sense". They should actually step back and evaluate the person for where they came from or what they might have experienced. Fighters and other athletes that come from places most people would be scared to walk through carry with them a deep cutting pain that's hard to get away from even in the midst of success. Now I know it doesn't apply to everyone but do some research on your favorite fighters and other athletes, I think you'd be surprised at what you find.
        I've spent years trying to get past the pain of my youth. I started fighting late but I don't know how to live without it. Once I found out how to win I couldn't stop competing. When I do stop I feel incomplete and like I have to do something to get that feeling back. It's where I feel the safest, when it's not safe at all.

Peace guys, don't forget to support me in my October 9th fight. Message me for details and I always appreciate comments.