Do hard things, including love more.

    

Where I thought the gym was going to be.

 It's been a little while since I've written anything but plenty of things have been on my mind. First is an update on the gym. We have reached the two year mark and it is by far one of the hardest things i've done and it was made exponentially harder due to the circumstances. As the recently deceased Nipsey Hussle expressed, this is a marathon not a sprint. So for everything that has transpired throughout this journey I am happy with where we are. So very grateful for everyone and every opportunity. Thank you all.

      It's easy for people to tell you what and how you should go about your life but the truth is there are plenty of examples to draw upon. The majority of the most successful of us didn't get gifted anything. The difference between making personal dreams and accomplishments become reality lies in choice. We all have a choice to honestly pursue our own successes even in the face of seemingly  insurmountable obstacles. Quit or keep going is your choice and your challenge I commend those that continue forward and I understand and encourage those that need a rest and regroup. Just don't quit.

     Let the obstacles in front of you testing your resolve become benchmarks in your growth and vision of your goals. Even if you have to switch lanes to get back on track do so with ferocity and acceptance that even though it is out of the way your are on the right path and your choice has already been made.

     Over this last couple of years I have run into mountains. I doubted myself to my soul but I made the choice to just keep going. I've had to sacrifice some friendships and relationships not based on anything that happened but simply for my own mental health. I had to isolate from the negative vibes and love from a distance. I was and still am in search of...but I also have found so much in myself. Much like fighting an opponent in the ring, fighting through adversity gives you a different view of yourself as a human being and each conquest gives you a further vision as to what could be.

     One of the hardest things to do in this life seems like it should be the easiest and that is to Love. Not the love you give to your mate though it should be measured accordingly. To love those around you even if you disagree with their ideas even if they aren't down for you. It's easiest to put them in the “they can fuck off” category but can you still have love for those that don't believe in you? The answer is a resounding YES!

     I know this is a hard concept and I struggle with this as well but I believe in it. Just because I don't rock with you like that or you don't have good things to bring to my personal universe doesn't mean I can't have love for you, even if it's from afar. I personally can't grow and become what I want and at the same time have hate in my heart for another person. It's a work in progress…

    Lost a few friends over the last couple of years and I just want to take this moment to say love more those around you. Your paths may cross for years or for a brief moment in time but we gotta do better about appreciating those moments as a culture.

    When the artist, entrepreneur Nipsey Hussle was murdered last week it really hit me hard because I was truly inspired by him. I had some people message me about it because they knew how much I looked up to him. I would listen to his mixtapes and get hyped about making something bigger than myself happen. Though I am not there yet I know I'm on the right path. I know that you are too.

   Keep doing hard things to make you a better human and keep loving more to prove you are an evolving human.

Peace and Blessings.

L

R.I.P. Bigg Rodd

R.I.P. Nipsey Hussle

     

The Purge: Making room for gratitude

Well well well... Its been a long time since we were here together. When I used to write this blog it was a way for me to get out my feelings, good or bad. A way to tell stories of my life's journey. It was a way to connect to my friends and to be honest about who I am and how I perceive not only Muay Thai but the Martial arts world as a whole. It was my outlet. Since the last time I wrote this blog my life has changed drastically as well as my relationship with Muay thai and martial arts in general. I finally achieved a huge goal in opening the first Lucky's Muay Thai gym. It was bitter sweet because at the same time I went through a devastating break up which split up my family. Everything I was working towards was still in place but the reasons I did them changed tremendously. I honestly wasn't sure if I would make it. I spent a lot of nights after everyone left the gym sitting at my desk pouring tears. If it wasn't for my amazing friends, family and students I'm not sure I would have gotten through it. For that kind of love I am forever grateful. However, between the stresses of the gym opening and Miami getting a CAT 4 hurricane which killed business for months, and fighting off depression and panic attacks daily, I was drowning. I was completely aware that it wasn't going well and I was doing my best to keep it moving. Fortunately, I did. Now I have to do my best every day to leave those feelings where they belong, in the past.
   It wasn't until now that I finally feel like Lucky's
Muay Thai will be here as a staple of the combat sport community for a long time to come. It isn't because of me, it is because of all of you. It was without a shadow of a doubt that my self belief got me to this point but it is your belief in me that kept me going when all was lost(believe me, it was lost). People coming up to me to tell me about the video they saw on the Internet or someone telling me that I had helped them change their life because of something I said or because the gym was there for them, how can I not be grateful. I have been more than fortunate to have two people that I met that believed in this vision enough that they were willing to jump on this boat with me and help me keep it afloat. Shout out to Benjamin London and Jacob Israel for having good hearts. That brings me to this. Now that the dark cloud is dissipating and the sun is peeping through, its time to work. I want to give you what you all give me, encouragement, support, direction, and above all else, LOVE. I'd like to personally welcome back everyone that rocked with the LMT family into the new space and we would like to welcome all the new members that have been hitting us up non-stop for information. We are for sure a family and we are as dysfunctional as any good family always is. I love you guys and 2019 is our year to make memories and accomplish goals together. I can't wait to build this gym up to reach it's full potential. I am so proud of everything we did and how you all played such an integral part of it all.

I am grateful for you all

Lucky

P.S. LET'S GO!!

FEAR

Dressing room pre-fight

                As the days leading up to the competition turn into weeks and the weeks quietly become months there is a literal roller coaster of emotion that overtakes a fighters psyche. There is a mix of anxiety, frustration, happiness, a feeling off being a warrior prepared for battle at anytime and a feeling of fear that most couldn't handle. It is the way in which we see ourselves change and evolve on a daily basis and sometimes the emotions can change by the second. Our brains are flooded with questions; Is my opponent better than me? Have I trained enough? Why am I doing this? Maybe I should just quit. And this is just the tip of the iceberg it can go deeper and deeper even seeping into the fighter's personal life. Fear is the great revealer. Whomever a fighter thinks they are can be deciphered by what they do with their fear. Can they use it to become better at their craft or will they fall victim like so many before them and crumble at their opponents feet or even make it to the fight at all.
              During my camp for any competition I generally start out very upset with myself and that is on a good or a bad day. I have a genuine anger aimed at myself for not being better. I love greatness and I may not ever be great but I want to feel like I am working as hard as the great ones do, and regardless of how many hours I put in I never feel like it's enough. I eventually get passed those feelings in a few weeks and then I start to question my opponent and how good they might be and if I should even continue on and if I have an injury I wonder to myself if its enough to make me stop training and even call off the fight or drop from the competition. The answer unequivocally is a resounding no I will never quit and every moment I'm not training my opponent probably is so I have to keep working. If you catch me around this time and ask me if I'm ready or how do I feel I will always have jokingly tell you that "I am terrified". Half joking...
                By the last few weeks of training I am a ball of anxiety. Nothing is as good as it should be and if I can't correct it I am pissed off. I have turned my stress and anger outward at this point. I can safely say that it is not a time to pick at me and I am in no way satisfied with anything. I want to fight so bad but I know I am not where I want to be. I do know however that there is no way I am being out trained. I am putting in the work. That was all motivated by fear. I have heard other fighters say similar things about being motivated by the fear, not of the other fighter but about what could happen about "getting caught". This is a commonly used phrase in the fighting world meaning a fighter got clipped by a punch, a kick or even a submission they didn't see coming or they fell into as in, " I was doing great and just got caught". That fear is real, when it is said like that it is meant to say that at that moment it was out of your control the same as getting bitten by a shark, it just happened. Every day is a day training to be the one catching the other guy.

Erupting post fight

               The reality though is that we will get punched and kicked and choked and people will cheer or boo or yell ridiculous things that should be saved for pro wrestling i.e. "rip his fucking head off" or "fucking kill him"(really not trying to kill anybody j/s) but most will never understand what it is that you are voluntarily doing. Risking your health both mental and physical for the entertainment of the spectator and the promoters wallet. In return for this we get to stare deep into our own souls and determine that we are not weak or afraid, we are in fact brave. There is a moment where the fear disappears, maybe in the dressing room or as they announce your name or you step through the ropes but when that threshold is crossed you've officially realized that fear is everything because it pushed you and at that very same moment you realize it is nothing.

Stress the constant opponent

             Stress in one definition was described as "mental, emotional, or physical strain or tension". They simply forgot about athletes because as far as I can tell it's generally all of the above. Dealing with the stresses of everyday life along with the expectations, and physical demands is enough to have you curled up in the fetal position calling for momma. I certainly wish that was a joke. Often times friends and family might not understand what your vision is, or they might expect to much. Or as is the case most times we as athletes expect too much of ourselves. We all understand that without that mentality it is difficult to achieve the highest of dreams. It is the thing that makes victory so sweet and defeat almost unbearable. However that being said it is an extreme amount of pressure to put on oneself. Compounding life's stresses with the physical exertion used during training can be overwhelming. Pushing yourself to your physical limitations while under the pressures of your life outside of the gym often leads to injury, anxiety, and even depression. Adding onto that is the idea that somewhere down the road the athlete has to perform at the highest level possible. Knowing that in a few weeks someone is waiting to try to kick your head off your shoulders is an anxiety that'll have you not sleeping at night as well as not eating. One or two of these issues isn't easy to deal with but a combination of all of these could be the downfall for the athlete. In Muay Thai, MMA, Boxing, as well as other combat sports high levels of stress could mean the doorway to a serious injury that could even be career threatening. 
             So how do we deal with this?  I'm not sure that there is one clear cut answer. I believe that to combat this opponent you must attack it from multiple angles. First, make sure you're getting enough rest. Sleep is key to recovery from training as well as mental health. Make sure your diet is compatible with your training and that your getting proper nutrients. After attacking it from the inside take some time and do something fun with friends socially. See a movie, get out to dinner, and laugh. Take your mind off of the pressure for a moment. You train hard, you deserve a break to clear your head.
As you move closer to your fight or event, spend some time in a quiet space meditating or visualizing. This will help you maintain your focus and see what it is you want to do in the fight. Last but not least, Yoga might be your key, stretching and breathing are definitely helpful in relieving stress in your body and what ever is circulating in your brain. 
I have to admit I am not the best at managing my stress but much better now then in the past. I did something that isn't mentioned above, I simplified. I spent some time trying to figure out what I wanted in my life and began to slice away at the excess. This isn't to say that everything is always perfect, I still suffer from some heavy anxiety from time to time. So I try my best to keep up with at least a few of suggestions above at all times. If you're suffering anxiety due to stress, whether it's work or relationships, or competition, or all of the above, just remember everything will ultimately be okay. Spend some time trying to find a way to relax and breathe. Life is hard and there is no handbook on how to deal with the pressures but with a little practice and a good support system you'll surely overcome all obstacles in the way of reaching your goals. Good luck and be blessed.